Sunday, January 21, 2007

Weekend update and a question

The floor is done! I can´t believe it, but we really did it!

Friday we took off from work and finished with everything! It helped that today (Sunday) was my MIL ´s birthday and we hosted the dinner. Well, everything needed to be ready by today!

Yesterday was our first wedding anniversary! I can´t believe that already a year passed, so much happened this year and it felt like 3 years, but on the other side it felt like yesterday. This was our civil wedding anniversary. Our Jewish wedding was in July, which means we are celebrating twice :) Why two wedding?

In most countries in Europe state and religion are separated, meaning that if you want to get married, you have to get married civil. If you wish you can get married religiously too, but in any case you have to go first and sign the official papers. Usually people get married civil the day or during the week before the Chuppah (or church), but in our case we decided to get married once in each country. So the civil wedding was a year ago in Sweden. It was snowing like crazy, my whole family flew in on Thursday night, we got married on Friday morning, it took exactly 32 seconds and then I had a new name..... In the evening we had a Shabbes dinner at my MIL. It was nothing big and yet a big change in my life. The chuppah and wedding party was last summer in Switzerland, where Mr. J.S. family flew in and we celebrated again a whole weekend long. This winter was very mild so far, almost no snow, but last evening around 6pm it started snowing and when we went for our anniversary dinner we had like 30 cm of fresh snow on our car :) We felt like a year ago - it was fantastic!

Today we cleaned and cooked and at 4pm the whole family came over for dinner. The apartment looks really great and I am so glad we changed the floor to a wooden floor, even in the kitchen, where everybody told us not to do it. It looks amazing and I LOVE our apartment. There is lots left to do, lots of details, lamps and curtains are missing etc. Luckily next weekend my sister is coming and we will go to some furniture shops together, I can´t wait to get her advise on how to decorate and what to buy.


Tomorrow I am starting my Swedish language course again. I am very much looking forward to that. On one side it is very helpful to have lessons to improve my language skills and on the other side it is a great place to meet people. Our social life was very poor so far. My husband doesn´t have friends here anymore, he lived abroad for almost 6 years and after a while he didn´t keep in touch. I have one friend here that I know since my childhood, but they have two children and we don´t meet too often. I am used to have lots of friends and meeting friends often. So far I didn´t miss not having friends here too much, we were busy deciding where we want to live, then we were busy finding an apartment and then we were busy renovating and furnishing it. We are both very family oriented and spent most of our free time with Mr. J.S. family. But now I feel the time has come for us to build a social life and meet new and old friends. My husband will call up some old friends and I hope to build some friendships and strengthen some of my Swedish class. I am not ready yet to mingle with the Jewish community here, I feel like my husband should first make some calls and talk personally to some of his old friends before I start to be active int he community. I am sure it is just a matter of time until I feel comfortable and until we meet some of his old friends.

But anyhow, how do you meet new friends in a new country? Any ideas?

11 comments:

Baleboosteh said...

Happy anniversary!!

About the friends, you are not a hard person to get along with JS!
I am sure you will make new friends quite easily whether it be at the gym, at your Swedish course, through your husbands old friends or within the Jewish community.

BTW, I can't believe you have finished your floor already!

:D

Tamara said...

Wow, such a busy life. So happy for you on everything you two have achieved.

I don't know why you want to wait to get involved with the Jewish community. I think one of the very easiest ways to meet people would be to maybe find a women's group that has get togethers. like at my shul we do something once a month. This month's woman's circle is about meditation and there will also be a painting workshop. Anyway, meeting other women will allow you to have girlfriends and if they are married they will have husbands and you can start having new friends over and getting to know others.

Just a thought.

socialworker/frustrated mom said...

Great things are happening for you I am happy for you happy annivarsary.

Anonymous said...

congrats on finishing the floor- as for finding new friends- just look for a local ex-pat association. Thats always a good place to start- or an English language club- you'll make lots of friends- fast. Glad that all is going so well for the two of you.

Anonymous said...

The floor was a "pita" to rip out. We made some video clips, where I am sweating. It’s so funny to watch them now, when all is done. We really made a team effort together, and almost no fighting, which should be rewarded :) Men vs. women, is not always the easiest. We love our new home, and will enjoy it for many years from now.

About the Jewish social life... it is a much closed community in Stockholm, where everyone more or less knows each other. There are so many people that you learn to like, but unfortunately, also "not to like". We all grew up together, in the kindergarten, then continued in the Jewish school, and then finished off in high school. On top of that, we had 3 different Jewish youth organizations, and a Jewish summer camp. 80% of the people were the same.

When leaving the country 6 years ago, I was pretty much done, and tired of everyone, except a few very close friends, and was more than happy to leave. It’s not easy to keep in contact even though you have access to messengers, so you start to fade away. Your everyday life takes over. I am kind of regretting it, but it’s never too late to make a few phone calls again. The time has soon arrived to be more social. We just wanted to land, after a few crazy years.

Sara with NO H said...

I'm having enough problems trying to make friends just moving to a new state. Sigh

Pragmatician said...

Aah the feeling after something is finally done in your apartment!
I remember, it's really cool.
Furniture shopping is fun but can be very frustrating as well.
Remember to always see something twice before deciding to purchase.

The Birthday Girl said...

Mazal Tov on your anniversary! You sound so domesticated already!

The best way to meet new people is to start getting involved with charities and other associations!

smb said...

I hear you. Making new friends is hard. I think if I moved to another place, I would have to know someone who can introduce me to others.

Anonymous said...

Congrats again on your anniversary. How about a long-time-not seen combined with a house warming party for your old/new friends. A party is easy going and not so stiff.

Mia M said...

Baleboosteh: thanks! I can´t believe either, the apartment looks so much nicer now!!!

Tamara: so far I didn´t find a woman circle. There is one for teen-girls and then there are many shiurim. But I contacted the local Chabad and am getting their weekly newsletter now.

Ami: thanks for the tip, I will look that up!

Shy: thanks and I do everyday or better everytime I walk around in the apartment!

Sara: it´s just not that easy, no matter how outgoing and easy to talk to you are. good luck!

Prag: in the beginning we were very good at buying and deciding. But the more we have to more difficult it gets to match and decorate. Hope my sister will have some good ideas!

The birthday girl: that´s a great idea! I think they are looking for Purim-Mishloach Manot "helpers"..... I will look into that!

Lvnsm27: that would make life so much easier!

Hi from Switzerland: that´s a great idea too and we are actually planning some kind of house warming party once all is done.